lolTwilight

A sappy love story between a pedophile vampire (over 100 years old) and a clueless human girl. 'Nuff said.

every 10 year old girls dream come true. how disgusting. plus if the vampire gets the girl knocked up, then the kid'll die once (s)he hits the sunlight. Also do vampires operate like plants, cause i remember in underworld the lycans kiled vampires with UV bullets so what the EFFF?

Cram wrote:

every 10 year old girls dream come true. how disgusting. plus if the vampire gets the girl knocked up, then the kid'll die once (s)he hits the sunlight. Also do vampires operate like plants, cause i remember in underworld the lycans kiled vampires with UV bullets so what the EFFF?

the problem is that they live in Seattle so there IS no sunlight to hit the child

and besides that sunlight.."Don't underestimate us MODERN vampires! We got over the whole sunlight thing generations ago."

VVO-The obsessor wrote:

How would a vampire even have a kid? I mean...their heart doesn't exactly pump blood there anymore...

-stabbed for innuendo-

Just because they don't have flowing blood doesn't mean they CAN'T have an erection /sarcasm

life lessons learned from watching twilight:
1.ALWAYS sleep with pants on. you never know when your creepy stalker vampire will break into your room
2. wearing $110 sunglasses to cover maybe 15% of your face, thereby making you infinitely hotter, is a great tactic for blending in.
3. voice-over narration is NEVER good idea
4. when you're hot you can get away with murder, literally, and everyone will still love you.
5. arizona airports allow you to bring your favorite cactus on a plane (but you may have to buy it a ticket), which is pretty cool, seeing as i can't get through LAX with a bottle of lotion.
6. hiding out in a mostly- transparent mansion is a smart way of confusing an angry mob, should they choose to come after you and your Undead family.
7. being a self-centered, whiny, egotistical b*itch is a good way to attract your dream guy. try it.
8. necrophilia/pedophilia is ok as long as its consensual.

what did you guys learn?

magpie wrote:

life lessons learned from watching twilight:
1.ALWAYS sleep with pants on. you never know when your creepy stalker vampire will break into your room
2. wearing $110 sunglasses to cover maybe 15% of your face, thereby making you infinitely hotter, is a great tactic for blending in.
3. voice-over narration is NEVER good idea
4. when you're hot you can get away with murder, literally, and everyone will still love you.
5. arizona airports allow you to bring your favorite cactus on a plane (but you may have to buy it a ticket), which is pretty cool, seeing as i can't get through LAX with a bottle of lotion.
6. hiding out in a mostly- transparent mansion is a smart way of confusing an angry mob, should they choose to come after you and your Undead family.
7. being a self-centered, whiny, egotistical b*itch is a good way to attract your dream guy. try it.
8. necrophilia/pedophilia is ok as long as its consensual.

what did you guys learn?

I learned that Edward can magically make pants disappear. 'Nuff said.

.sickling. wrote:

magpie wrote:

life lessons learned from watching twilight:
1.ALWAYS sleep with pants on. you never know when your creepy stalker vampire will break into your room
2. wearing $110 sunglasses to cover maybe 15% of your face, thereby making you infinitely hotter, is a great tactic for blending in.
3. voice-over narration is NEVER good idea
4. when you're hot you can get away with murder, literally, and everyone will still love you.
5. arizona airports allow you to bring your favorite cactus on a plane (but you may have to buy it a ticket), which is pretty cool, seeing as i can't get through LAX with a bottle of lotion.
6. hiding out in a mostly- transparent mansion is a smart way of confusing an angry mob, should they choose to come after you and your Undead family.
7. being a self-centered, whiny, egotistical b*itch is a good way to attract your dream guy. try it.
8. necrophilia/pedophilia is ok as long as its consensual.

what did you guys learn?

I learned that Edward can magically make pants disappear. 'Nuff said.

I didn't know you thought that way XD *stabbed* jk

I learned...that if at least you're going to attempt to make something like this...screw the modern type of vampire, just call it something completely different! (they can still drink blood) like a...a...*fails to make slightly original name*

I learned Bella needs an umbrella....and that I don't like Dragonball Z baseball...and that all of the characters tend to be extreamly guillible...and that the author must've been insane to turn it into a vampire novel after writing HALF of the first book...wait, I already knew that last one

very good, class.
also remember, the key to world domination is amazingly disheveled hair.